Pamiętnikiem opiekuje się Kenaya

[ Powr�t ]

Środa, 07 Listopada, 2007, 18:11

BEZPOWROTNIE STRACONA JEST KA�DA CHWILA...

No wi�c najwy�szy czas na notk�. W ko�cu znalaz�am czas, mia�am ochot� i nic mi nie przeszkadza�o. Czy wynagrodzi Wam to d�ugie czekanie? Oby
Sa przemy�lenia jak obieca�am, z g��bi serduszka, mojego oczywi�cie. Nie przed�u�aj�c...

***************************************************

2 listopad, sobota, 1991

Cudownie jest przechadza� si� po szkole i widzie� tyle szcz�liwych twarzy. Zapomina si� wtedy o swoich problemach, daj�c swojemu umys�owi nie�wiadomy odpoczynek. Czy to ta pogoda tak nastraja ludzi? W tym roku jak nigdy run�a na nas poka�na ilo�� �niegu. Jezioro wspaniale zamarz�o , zach�caj�c do �lizgania si� po nim. Na dworze zimno, w zamku zimno, gdzie wi�c szukaj� ogrzania moi zaradni uczniowie? W ramionach swoich koleg�w, kole�anek, czy raczej ch�opak�w, dziewczyn. To cudowne, �e ludzie w ich wieku szukaj� blisko�ci drugiego cz�owieka, jest ona bowiem nam bardzo potrzebna. Czasem sobie nawet nie zdajemy sprawy jak bardzo nasza dusza i cia�o potrzebuj� aby je kto� przytuli�, pog�aska�, poca�owa�. Wracam wi�c do pytania, kt�re zada�em na samym pocz�tku. Czy to ta pogoda tak nastraja ludzi? �e s� tacy szcz�liwi? Nie. To obecno�� tej drugiej osoby, kt�ra dla ka�dego z nas znaczy bardzo wiele, a czasami nawet, jest ca�ym, ogromnym �wiatem.
Jednak w�r�d tych u�miechni�tych twarzy przewija�y si� co jaki� czas kompletne przeciwie�stwa. Smutna mina, wzrok sprawnie omijaj�cy wszystkie „pary”. Co w nich si� odbija? Zazdro��? �al? Smutek? Uczucie niesprawiedliwo�ci dotykaj�ce ich? Mo�e wszystko po trochu, a mo�e… to m�j ju�-nie-najlepszy wzrok sp�ata� mi figla i w rzeczywisto�ci ka�dy jest szcz�liwy? Pozostan� przy tej my�li. My�li pocieszaj�cej i podnosz�cej na duchu. Dlaczego si� tym tak bardzo przejmuj�? Nie czuj� si� wzgl�dem nich jak dyrektor, tylko ojciec, kt�ry chce aby jego dzieci by�y wiecznie u�miechni�te oraz aby dozna�y sympatii ze strony drugiego cz�owieka.

W �yciu widzia�em ju� wiele cierpienia, b�lu, opuszczenia, z ca�� pewno�ci� nie chc� nigdy wi�cej musie� na to patrze�. O wiele bardziej wol� gdy otacza mnie mi�o�� i przyja��. Zreszt� jak ka�dy, albo prawie ka�dy, Tom na pewno nie zawraca sobie swojej g�owy? umys�u? takimi b�ahostkami jak mi�o��. Pr�dzej ja przejd� na stron� ciemno�ci ni� on zapragnie mie� przyjaciela. �miercio�ercy by ju� tu pewnie wtr�cili swoje 2 knuty „Czarny Pan uwa�a mnie za swojego przyjaciela”. To z�udzenie, Riddle nigdy nie chcia�, nie chce i nie b�dzie chcia� mie� bliskiej osoby takiej do kochania i tulenia, do wy�alania si� i do s�uchania. Tom to bry�a lodu magicznie przemieniona w cz�owieka jednak nie posiadaj�ca �adnych pozytywnych jego stron, cech. On tak naprawd� nie �yje, on istnieje, ale nie �yje. Nie czerpie z �ycia �adnej jego zalet, przyjemno�ci . On po prostu jest, czy si� nam to podoba czy nie.

Hmm dziwna my�l mi w�a�nie przysz�a do g�owy. Mianowicie mo�e potrzebna nam taka posta�. Posta� bezwzgl�dna, okrutna, m�ciwa? Posta� Toma Riddle'a II, dzi�ki kt�remu zacz�li�my docenia� to co mamy, TYCH co mamy. Przed jego dzia�alno�ci�, �e si� tak wyra�� ludzie nie byli dla siebie najlepiej nastawieni. Istnia�a mi�dzy nimi niezgoda, a k��tnie w niekt�rych rodzinach by�y na porz�dku dziennym. Jednak gdy zacz�� pozbawia� nas tych cz�onk�w naszych rodzin, z kt�rymi zaczynali�my dzie� od niemi�ego „daj mi spok�j”, zacz�li�my ich docenia�. Ich i ich obecno�� w�r�d nas. Ju� nie liczy�o si� to, �e On by� dla Niej nieuprzejmy, Tamten przekl�� Tamtego, liczy�o si� tylko to, �e ich ju� nie ma, �e nasze serce poczu�o t� strat� i teraz cierpi ogromne katusze. Liczy�o si� to, �e zacz�li�my dostrzega� w tych ludziach rzeczy, na kt�re wtedy nie zwracali�my uwagi. Zacz�y dr�czy� nas wyrzuty sumienia, a g�owa nie chcia�a da� spokoju od ci�gle powtarzaj�cych si� s��w „ju� nigdy…”, „dlaczego nie…”.
Dlatego tak wa�ne jest aby dostrzec t� mi�o��. Zauwa�y� j� w ludziach nas otaczaj�cych i odwdzi�cza� si� im tym samym. Nie ma nic gorszego ni� ca�e dnie sp�dza� sam na sam z w�asnym „ja” stroni�c od innych. Cz�owiek jest ju� tak zbudowany. Potrzebuje mi�o�ci i blisko�ci kogo� drugiego, w samotno�ci pogr��a si� w otch�ani, w kt�rej nie ma cho�by p�omyka nadziei.


"Bezpowrotnie stracona jest ka�da chwila, kt�rej nie wype�nia mi�o��."*





*Torquato Tasso; www.mysli.com.pl

Komentarze:

I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name <a href=" http://www.fasrm.com/index.php/galerias ">favourable topiramate price cvs chairman</a> It&rsquo;s a lovely notion to fix what&rsquo;s in people&rsquo;s hearts, but I&rsquo;m not sure that it is a practical response. It&rsquo;s like so many aspects of human behaviour that inflict harm on other people: we shouldn&rsquo;t speed; we shouldn&rsquo;t drink alcohol before getting behind the wheel of a car; we shouldn&rsquo;t drive recklessly. But people do, every day, even while knowing in their hearts that others &ndash; and they themselves &ndash; might get hurt in the process.

An estate agents <a href=" http://www.incrops.co.uk/newsletter ">mystery 25mg clomid toothache</a> While Feldman was having innocent fun with Jackson, the scene was different at a soda pop nightclub in Los Angeles frequented by Drew Barrymore, Ricky Schroder, Christina Applegate and, of course, the two Coreys. Feldman doesn’t name the club.

good material thanks <a href=" http://www.rgf-executive.com.vn/practices.php ">alexis purchase medroxyprogesterone online bullet</a> Indeed, a competitor, DirecTV, came to Time Warner's defense on Saturday, issuing a statement that praised the cable company. "In trying to protect our won customers, DirecTV has certainly had its share of these battles, so we applaud Time Warner Cable for fighting back against exorbitant programming cost increases," the statement said.

Do you know the address? <a href=" http://www.winchcombe.co.uk/directory ">installs athlete Buy Cheap Bupropion confused obtain</a> "Dear Boy is not bound by the modern, but has an ear to the ground for the pavement beats of life," said Winterson. "We like the confidence of the first person, multiple, reflective and new."

US dollars <a href=" http://www.incrops.co.uk/newsletter ">jaw foreground clomid day 25 cramps safeguard ankle</a> Lewis got canned on July 25, but his biography, which is still visible on the Fox News website, says the head flack joined the station in April 1996 as vice president of media relations. He was promoted four years later to senior vice president of corporate communications. Before that, he worked at CNBC.

Have you got any qualifications? <a href=" http://www.lin.ie/about-lin/#studious ">generic abilify 5mg</a> Sometimes it helps to get into another line of business. In the 1980s Michael Milken, then at Drexel Burnham Lambert, plead guilty to securities law violations. Since serving nearly two years in prison and paying $600 million in fines, Mr. Milken, barred from the securities industry, has been actively engaged in philanthropy.

I'm in my first year at university <a href=" http://herrljungacider.se/wateraid/#clutch ">order celexa online no prescription</a> "Make a few changes to your party outfit, and you'll beat the temptation to overindulge. At a cocktail party, carry a clutch instead of a purse. With a cocktail in one hand and your handbag in the other, you won't be able to reach for too many hors d'oeuvres.

I'd like to send this parcel to <a href=" http://www.sueflood.com/favourite-kit#luncheon ">diflucan 200 mg para que sirve</a> It is a far from impossible outcome. The Brotherhood has been damaged by Morsi&#039;s lacklustre period in office but they remain the best-organised force in the country. The way they have been treated will add anger and zest to their campaigning.

Do you need a work permit? <a href=" http://socialpsykiatri.se/index.php/about-us#buds ">best place to buy bimatoprost</a> “When you have nothing to lose, you can play with so much freedom, so loose,” Serena said of Lisicki, the 23rd seed. “I felt she was just on today. She’s always on against big players on big courts. She was definitely reading my serve. It’s not a shock. She plays well on grass. She has a massive, massive serve. She’s a great grass-court player. She’s not a pushover. She’s actually super fast. She plays good defense as well. Still, Williams said, “I probably couldn’t be more disappointed.”

We've got a joint account <a href=" http://socialpsykiatri.se/index.php/about-us#brows ">volum bimatoprost</a> “I’ve done it before. It’s not like it’s the first time I’m doing it,” Jeter said. “I’m not concerned about it. It was good to get back in the game, but I don’t have a checklist on it.”

I'm at Liverpool University <a href=" http://herrljungacider.se/wateraid/#resources ">celexa 60 mg fda</a> This "new normal" Bronars refers to employment growth just keeping pace with population growth over the past year as the economy created 175,000 to 180,000 jobs per month. Bronars adds that the unemployment rate has fallen to 7.6 percent from 8.2 percent over the past year largely because people have given up looking for work and are no longer counted as unemployed. Meanwhile, the fraction of adults who are employed has not changed in the past three years because of relatively slow growth and the aging of the U.S. workforce, he said.

I'd like to open a personal account http://lightmongers.co.uk/charity.html deposit direct loan no payday Officials from Pena Nieto's ruling centrist Institutional Revolutionary Party (PRI) have issued differing views on whether that will include the most important - article 27 - which explicitly prohibits concessions and has also been interpreted to ban risk-sharing contracts.

Photography http://dinbox.se/nedladdning/ fast an easy cash loan lenders Zhang Min, president of the Waigaoqiao car supermarket inShanghai, was quoted as saying that while the government imposed taxes on luxury cars, the difference between prices paid inChina and overseas amounted to "profiteering".

Can I use your phone? http://www.maruswim.com/size-guide payday loan companies that dont use teletrack The operator, known as Tepco, has been struggling to containradioactive leaks since a 2011 earthquake and tsunami causedextensive damage and triggered the world's worst nuclear crisissince Chernobyl in 1986.

I'd like to send this parcel to http://artist-how-to.com/studio/portraits/ small loan online The department posted signs on beaches warning people to stay out of the water and not to consume any dead fish found in the area. The brown plume was expected to remain visible for weeks while natural tides and currents slowly flush the area, the health department said.

Thanks funny site http://www.grasmerehotel.com/conferences/ fast cash personal loans online "If it was a 15 to 30 percent bounty provision forwhistleblowers bringing claims under FIRREA, you'd see more,"said Shayne Stevenson, a lawyer at Hagens Berman Sobol Shapiro,who has brought other False Claims Act cases against Bank ofAmerica.

good material thanks http://sinestezia.com/publications/ easy and fast payday loans In the United Arab Emirates, Dubai's bourse rose1.8 percent to its highest level since November 2008, asinvestors bet on strong second-quarter results. The market is up56.6 percent year-to-date, reflecting a recovery in the keysectors of real estate and banking.

I work for myself http://www.grasmerehotel.com/conferences/ instant loan unsecured "Savers should be able to benefit," Roth says, because he expects the rates on certificates of deposit, savings accounts and money market accounts to all go up. However, he warns savers against locking up their money in longer-term products, like CDs, which can make it harder to take advantage of quickly rising rates.

I can't get through at the moment http://www.maruswim.com/size-guide loan graduate "We see today's announcement as a signal of the PBOC and thenew leaders' commitment towards interest rate liberalization andmore market-oriented reform," wrote Jian Chang and Joey Chew,economists at Barclays, in a note to clients.

History http://www.grasmerehotel.com/conferences/ get a cash advance for 1000 Sir Andrew Witty, chief executive of GSK, said the company was very encouraged by the latest results and would now apply for a regulatory licence for its use in Africa under a special provision of the European Medicines Agency. "While we have seen some decline in vaccine efficacy over time, the sheer number of children affected by malaria means that the number of cases of the disease the vaccine can help prevent is impressive," he said.

« 1 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 »

| Script by Alex